My mother and I had sweet tender moments coupled with years of silence and forgotten wounds. One night she slipped quietly away and her 18-month battle with cancer was over. I was thirty-nine.
The struggle of regret left me wondering what our late-blooming relationship could have been like with the gift of more time. Her death spoke to my stalled heart as I stumbled through the motions of life. I cried, is this really all there is?
I realized I wouldn’t know something better unless I took a step of faith. Like an old trophy forgotten on a shelf, the Bible on my nightstand had gotten dusty. Opening the pages I found God’s words that met my need each day. My need for something greater grew out of the emotional pain I experienced with my mom’s passing. My Sunday school faith hadn’t grown to the personal relationship God longed to have with me. Our lives on earth are meant for something more. Like the promise in James 4:8a, “Come near to God and He will come near to you,” God was drawing me back to him.
John wrote, “In the beginning the Word already existed. The Word was with God and the Word was God.” (John 1:1 NLT). Jesus was with God in the beginning but he chose to live among us. “So the Word became human and made his home among us. He was full of love and faithfulness.” (John 1:14 NLT) Hope was born in a stable that night when God came near. Jesus’ birth and his Holy life on earth was the sacrificial plan to show us who God is and to reveal the path to God.
Every thrust of a jagged nail into Jesus’ hands and feet, every blood-stained tear and guttural, heart-wrenching shudder represent our sin that God yearns to replace with healing and hope. Jesus’ death on a sinner’s cross was the redeeming act through which He gave freely the greatest gift of all, salvation for all who believe in Him. “For it is my Father’s will that all who see his Son and believe in him shall have eternal life. I will raise them up in the last day.” (John 6:40 NLT)
Through an ongoing conversation, checking in, God guides the steps of my life with purpose and promise. Each day that I learn to trust him more I experience a richness and peace in my life I haven’t known before. I’m looking forward to Glory when that day we meet face to face.
“I pray also the eyes of your heart will be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you; the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints and his incomparably great power for us who believe.” Ephesians 1:18, 19 (NIV).